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Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Unhealthy relationships

Avoidance for women doesn't just mean to stay out of “fight potential” situations but also out of unhealthy relationships. Trust your instinct when it comes to dating. If you have those nagging feelings that something is not quite right, GO WITH IT !!! If someone is asking you out for anything and you do not feel comfortable about it for whatever reason, do yourself a huge favor and say NO.
Communicate that “no” in a completely unconditional manner. Leave no opening for someone to grab hold of, leave no doubt in his mind.
Don’t say: “I like you but I have a lot on my plate right now.” Or “I am not ready for a relationship right now.” In both those statements you left a possibility for the guy to cling to. You did not really say no, you gave him hope and a challenge. Instead say something along the lines of: “I have no romantic interest in you and I am certain I never will.”
There is only one appropriate reaction to this statement: to leave you alone. Anyone who tries to pursue this relationship further has showed a totally inappropriate reaction and I guarantee he will carry on an unhealthy relationship, be it a stalker or an abusive obsessive aggressive man.
Let’s be honest, the biggest complaint women have against their partner/ spouse is that they don’t listen to them, they don’t understand them. So why on God’s green earth would you embark in a relationship with a man who right off the bat doesn’t listen/ hear what you say (NO) or cares about how you feel (I am not ready- I am too busy).
Believe me, no man will pursue you this way because you are so special (sorry to disillusion you) or because he is madly in love with you (he does not know you). Do not fill your head with Hollywood romantic fantasies. It is unhealthy, dangerous and potentially lethal.